May 31, 2011

my statement

To make a long story short they did not have the sentencing...but here is what I said in court.

Since July 11, 2009 my life has been turned upside down. I have been left wondering how one person could destroy my future with my husband and best friend in an instant. Now I’m left trying to figure out the rest of my life with out him.

Because of Joe’s frequent travel, long work hours and biking schedule the amount of time we were actually together was limited which is why we made every moment count.

One way he showed how much he cared is through cards.


Some people live to work we worked to live and living for us was travel and adventure.

Ironically September 11, 2009 2 months after Joe died we had plans to go to Hawaii with my parents to celebrate both our anniversaries our 6th and their 50th. We were really looking forward to sharing this experience with my parents.

On July 11, 2009 while my parents were celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary, I was in shock as I called them to say Joe was killed. What was once a day of celebration is now a day of sadness.

We had a trip to experience another culture in April 2010 to Japan. Joe had been to Japan & China many times for work and had dreamed of taking me there. He said I would love it and he had a good trip planned for me.

When we were dating we discovered our love of live music. Which lead us to Austin TX – Live music capital of the world. Were enjoyed Austin City Limits music festivals for our 1st wedding anniversary. We then fell in love with the city. We dreamed of having a home there for winter get aways that dream was shattered.

Even though we didn’t have any children we had a dog-named Foxy. A small 4-pound Papillion/Chihuahua mix we rescued. At first the two of them had a love hate relationship some how she found her way into Joe’s heart and he loved coming home and spending time with her.

For months after his death she would look for him to come home and even now if I mention the words Daddy her big ears perk up and she looks around for him. I know she misses him everyday.


Even though my planned future with Joe is gone I have many wonderful memories of our life together. In our almost 6 years of marriage we packed so much living that friends often commented that we did more with our short time together than most people do in a whole life time.

I truly miss being able to pick up the phone to hear how his day is going at work, share a story from my day or reminisce on our life and things we have done.

Like how awesome the food is in Italy…Our fascination with seeing the Berlin Wall a piece of history we both remembered living through…Looking at a painting hanging on our wall and laughing at all the trouble we had trying to get it home in the rain.


Losing Joe has devasted my parents. They now constantly worry about me, because they lost the person they trusted to take care of me for the rest of my life. They truly thought of Joe as their son and vice versa.

When we lived in Brussels my parents planned a trip over Thanksgiving to visit us. There flight from Minneapolis was delayed which messed up the rest of there connections. Joe was so concerned about them arriving safely that he planned fly to Amersterdam to surprise them. Luckily he was there to help fix the situation. He truly cared about my parents and was grateful for every thing they have done for us.

Joe was thrilled when a year later my parents came for another visit this time at Christmas.

We wanted to do something special for my parents. Joe thought my dad would enjoy the war memorial and sites of Normandy, France. We surprised them with a trip there; Joe and my dad were like little kids climbing in the bunkers, checking out all the museums and almost getting caught in the very fast tides on the beach.

He was not only special to my parents but to my brother and his family. When my nephews Cole & Parker saw Joe race for the first time they were hooked. Joe was happy to talk to them and answer questions about bikes, training and equipment. Since the accident it took them a while to get back to biking.

Not only has Joe’s death impacted my future most deveasting to me is the affect on my present. I’m a very social person and many of our friends are not able to be around me or talk to me because I remind them of Joe. Not only is Joe gone but also my circle of friends is just when I need them the most.


Here are some comments from people Joe worked with

Joe’s death touched so many people everywhere not just in California and Minnesota.

I think about him everyday – his smile, his eyes, his laugh mostly of all I know that I was deeply loved and cherished by him.

I would like Mr. Valencia to think about what he took away from me, my family, friends and his colleagues every day of his life.

May 27, 2011

Happy Friday!

Here's to starting the holiday weekend off in a good way! Have a good weekend.

May 26, 2011


Yup that is Pope John Paul - this is the front of a church in Quito Ecuador - He was there at the church then they made a statue of him.

May 25, 2011

feeling the gap

Here is a photo from my trip...that space between the rocks is where some of the guys snorkled through. If I would have know I could have used the ring I used in the next spot I would have done it. However this is where they saw a ton of sharks - they were down deep but still.

May 24, 2011

Don't forget

A couple of things not to forget today - watch Oprah and don't forget that today the season finale of Glee is on tonight.

Also wish Bob Dylan and me happy birthday! Had to throw that in there.

May 23, 2011


I had the strangest dream last night. It was so strange I went to look it up in the book of 10,000 dreams interpreted.

Here is part of the meaning...To dream that you are sleeping on a bed in the open air, foretells that you will have delightful experience, and opportunity of improving your fortune.

I think I will take that.

May 19, 2011


Yesterday I went to plant my basil -long story not on my to do list. Who knew that carrots keep growing over the winter. Ana thought it was yummy.

Got my final draft of the impact statement done after pilates, expense list emailed to the DA, planted basil, cilantro and rosemary. Took the easy way out in the flower area - just bought plants already potted in planter. Used a whole bottle of weed killer - pulled up a bag full of dandelions

Also emailed the landscaper that some plants didn't make it over the winter.

If you can believe it people still ask me what do you do all day!

Today - waxing, hair, laundry and walking the dogs

May 16, 2011


This past weekend with a lunch on Saturday and a baseball game on Sunday I managed to find time to work on my victims impact statement. I have most of it done, now just rewriting it so I can read it and it makes sense. (you all know I forget some words if I don't re-read things)

I don't want to practice it too much, I don't want it to sound too rehearsal. I left areas where I just tell stories that are not written down.

As always I will keep you posted on what happens. This week will be busy trying to get everything done before I go. Not to mention my girls are feeling a little neglected. Not sure how I'm going to fit that time in.

May 12, 2011

more time please...

It has been crazy since I got back from vacation. I thought I would have more time with the trial being over however....I'm now trying to get caught up and getting ready for my next trip to LA. I still haven't started my speech or story of how Joe's death has impacted me. As I'm typing this my crazy dog Foxy is rolling over wanting her tummy rubbed. She is laying next to the lap top.

However I did get my ticket to tour Sony studios when I'm in LA. May be I will see some people from the Young and the restless. There she goes again rolling over - got a go rub a tummy.

May 9, 2011


I'm not sure but this photo looks like a bunch of trouble makers. Just imagine spending 10 days with crazy people like this.

May 6, 2011

Lens Cap...

This is how I spent my last night in Quito. A lovely dinner in a glass restaurant up on a mountain top. Nice and Innocent right.

Well the guides started us off with a shot of some strong liquor then a hot passion fruit spice cider with coco leaves.(think white powder stuff that is illegal) Anyway all of us were loopy and trying to take photos before dinner and I lost my lens cap over the ledge of the look out. Yes I know that is funny everyone keeps telling me that...not only are they laughing that I had a shot too. I did impress the guys with my shot taking abilities.

I'm on the far end of the table...where they started the bottle to do shots...that is why I'm so chatty with Tyson I guess.

May 5, 2011

Fish market

The Sea Lion laying on the tuna's the fisherman is trying to clean.

May 4, 2011

The Group

These are all the people responsible for getting me back to me. Not to mention making me laugh and smile...the trip was amazing!

My roommate in the pink top - Tyson in the white shirt with his arm on the turtle shell - Bob in the plaid shirt - Larry, tyson's dad next to Bob- Charles next to larry - the what's his name in the red bandana-Ken in the white shirt straight back the one married to Maya the other blonde in the photo it is his 4th polish wife- jorge our guide and Reed next to me is the professional photographer that helped us.

May 3, 2011

Oh yes I did

Posing in my lovely hat on the boat we cruised around in all day - San Cristobal Island

My snorkeling outfit...San Cristobal Island

May 2, 2011

I'm back

Here is a teaser photo from my trip...Sea Lions at the pier on San Cristobal Island (on of the many islands of the Galapagos Islands)